The whole fucking movie is the troll. There's so many reasons that I lost count. If you've seen The Force Awakens, you know that they've set up some "mysteries" that need to be resolved in future films. Well this film flushes every fucking one of them down the toilet. There's a bunch of Marvel-style bad jokes and visual gags that don't land and are always delivered at inappropriate times. Poe makes a crack about Hux's mother. Luke milks a sea creatures tit and sloppily drinks the green milk like a whore with cum dripping down her chin. Leia does a Mary Poppins routine. Spaceships that "drop" bombs... in space... where there's no gravity. There's a reference to the Star Wars parody "Hardware Wars". Evil BB-8. A pointless 40 minute sub-plot on a Monaco-like casino planet with too much CG that looks like the whole thing was a deleted scene from The Phantom Menace. I think Phasma gets even LESS time in this movie than the last. We don't find out anything about Snoke and we never will. Actually, we don't find out much of anything about anyone. After 2.5 hours, the movie basically ends up right where it started except now almost everyone is dead and the people who are left can comfortably fit in the Millenium Falcon.
Honestly, even if I described exactly what happens and spoil it for everyone else, you're not going to believe me. You need to see it for yourself. I can't believe that Disney actually let this thing get made. It looks great, the acting is great, and the dialogue is good... but the movie doesn't make any sense except as a giant middle finger to the viewer. It's like everything in the movie had to be a "twist" and the twist was "fuck you".
I think the biggest problem is that it's clear now that NOBODY at Disney/Lucasfilm had a vision for what this trilogy was going to be about. Usually, when you plan a three movie arc, you map out some of the larger plot points so that it creates a compelling story and creates a cohesive whole. They're just making it up as they go, one film at a time and it shows in the end product. Frankly, I'm shocked. They've got the Marvel movies planned out for the next 10 years but they can't plan out three Star Wars movies?
There's lot of people who are unhappy with this movie and the media/press is trying to spin it like we're a bunch of disgruntled basement dwellers who are upset because we "don't like change". That narrative is absolutely false. The problems with this movie have everything to do with story, plot, pacing, and character motivation. It honestly feels the screenplay was the first draft and it was written by someone who had never seen any of the Star Wars movies. It really felt like it could have used a few more drafts of the script to tighten it up and a once-over by basically ANYONE to give a second opinion on all the dumb shit that somehow made it into the movie.
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